Online and offline personalities

« Mighty Boosh story Pt. 2 | Noel Fielding cut his hair »

Online and offline personalities

by STiCKs13 @ 23 Feb. 2008 – 12:42:54

I have been like this O.O for the past 10 minutes are discovering a hate thread dedicated to me and a few other people on the Horrors forum. I'm not really upset, just....shocked! It's not even really that that I want to focus on, it's this:

Later on in the thread, they mention how I'm not too bad in real life and nothing like I am on there, and I wonder...is the 'real' side of our personalties online or offline? I've wondered this for a while but not really thought about it in depth but think about it: online we can say whatever we want and be really open with people we hardly even know, but offline/in person...that's us, that's our actions and where our personalities first evolved. Without the invention of the internet, we'd be stuck like that.

So, which is our truer self?

If I find out that my online person is who i really am, then that sucks because sometimes I hate me online, I say bad things all the time and don't really think before I speak. BUT I'm much more open. Offline I'm shyer but I'm not thinking in the back of my head that I want to act like I do online or else I'd be awful.

Both are part of our personalities obviously, but which is truer? There has to be one that overrides the other at least by a little bit, right?

This sounds dramatic as hell and I don't mean it to but I don't even know who I am anymore. I know I should do because I know me better than anyone else ever will but I don't!

Am I mean inside or am I all innocence and sparkles? Am I a bitch or am I just a shy bystander? Am I extremely annoying or not?

All I know is both offline and online, I can never say what I'm really thinking and am quite introverted.

So that's all I have, I'm an introvert...great, nice personality review, Sticks.

I honestly don't even feel like I'm me anymore...like I'm someone else thinking through this body.

I feel sick.
Options:
Tags:
- life
- internet
- about me
- personalities

19 Comments to Online and offline personalities

Hide subcomments

- calliegurn (Visitor)
- 23 Feb. 2008 @ 14:03:02
a hate thread dedicated to you? nice!
I like your blog because, i dunno how to explain this, but it's like I can see your exact train of thought and its more genuine that way. that was a bad explanation. anyway...
don't analyse it all too much, trust me, self-analysis drives you crazy!
x
- - STiCKs13
  - 23 Feb. 2008 @ 14:05:10
  Thanks.
  
  I'm probably most myself on this blog than I am anywhere else, even in real life.
  
  I stopped thinking about it anyway after talking to a mate so I don't feel so bunged up with self-hate.
  
  x
  - Reply to comment
  - Permalink
- Silverfox (Visitor)
- 23 Feb. 2008 @ 14:20:48
It's not just online and RL. In my experience we act very differently in different surroundings and around different people and sometimes in the evening I look back on events that day and realise that I can't believe some of the things I did and said (in a good way usually, I too am very introverted), but it felt completely natural at the time.

Clothes have a lot to do with it as well. Back in school I felt like a completely different girl when wearing my school uniform for example and I tend to be a lot more shy when wearing clothes I'm not comfortable in.
I once had a fight with a very outgoing co-worker who insisted I had to wear a blazer for a seminar. I went in jeans and a jumper instead and when we each had to get up and tell our strengths (MEEP!) to the whole class all she could manage was "I can't do this!" while I was commended on how relaxed and natural I'd looked.

By the way unless you're acting differently on the Horrors form than how I know you from the Boosh forum, that must be one nasty forum.
- - STiCKs13
  - 23 Feb. 2008 @ 14:28:08
  Well someone from there that's also on the Boosh forum said I was also awful on there and it sounded like she thought I was WORSE on the Boosh forum. =/ "You should see what she's like on the Mighty Boosh forum (accompnied with some sort of *facepalm* face or something, I don't remember)
  
  I did change a lot since I started going out with someone from the Boosh forum though and even though we're not together anymore, my personality stayed the same and I got much more sarcastic and bitchy.
  
  But I guess you're right, I know about the clothes thing and acting differently. Like when you see teachers out in town or when you wore uniform but saw people without uniform at parent's evening...much more relaxed in my opinion.
  
  But surely one personality must come out more online and off, that's what I think anyway.
  - Reply to comment
  - Permalink
- smoky (Visitor)
- http://www.myspace.com/galaxystarthorn
- 23 Feb. 2008 @ 21:45:51
I always thought the horum was quite nice!
Apparently not...
I'm a lot more outgoing on the net that off the net.
I'm also more sarcastic when i'm not online
But your personality depend on who you are with, what you're feeling like, maybe we don't even have a set personality, maybe we just completely change according to a variety of things

Oh and also, i've always thought you seem lovely
Are the mods gonna shut the hate thread down or not???
- - STiCKs13
  - 23 Feb. 2008 @ 22:10:01
  The mods joined in!!! I think the whole section has gone though cause since I replied with 'oh my god ' in shock, it got deleted like 10 mins after.
  
  And thanks for saying I'm lovely.
  - - on behalf of the SS (Visitor)
    - 16 Mar. 2008 @ 11:10:06
    that section of the horum is called the secret section and is where the mod team and friends discuss stuff together like what to do with the horum and when we're next going to have a meet up.
    
    we also discuss members we consider spammers because it gets really frustrating when you're trying to run a decent forum and it's being swallowed up in ridiculous posts that we consider spam.
    
    there was a fuck up on runboard which meant everyone could see the 'secret section' we didn't delete it, we fixed the html problem.
    
    i do apologies for it because i realise that its not a nice thing to read about yourself, and yes it is rather bitchy as well i know, but thats why its secret, so we can vent our anger etc.
    
    We all thought you were sound in person, but on The Horum you just seemed a bit to attention seek-y for our liking, hence the thread.
    
    I realise i'm probably going to get slated for writing this but i just wanted you to understand what happened properly.
    
    i just read this blog and i agree with your online/offline thing, and as you were so lovely in 'real' life, if you came back to the horum and started being more like your real self you would get a very warm welcome back.
    - - STiCKs13
      - 16 Mar. 2008 @ 17:42:30
      Thanks.
      - Reply to comment
      - Permalink
    - - smoky (Visitor)
      - 17 Mar. 2008 @ 04:31:35
      I know this should probably be over now and that, so sorry
      But this 'secret section' sounds awful, and saying that 'you didn't mean sticks to see' makes it worse.
      I am annoyed now.
      Sticks is nice.
      - Reply to comment
      - Permalink
- Lizzi (Visitor)
- 23 Feb. 2008 @ 22:01:38
Random comment, but I thought this was an interesting topic =)

I, apparently, am exactly the same online as I am offline. I met someone, and asked them afterwards and he told me I am indentical. Sometimes, I have to know someone for a couple of weeks before I would be as open with them as I am with everyone I meet on the net.
But then another person said I was funnier online, and I realised it's because online, you can delete anything you say wrong, and edit stuff to make it sound better. You can't do that in real life. What is said is what is said.

But I think that I'm actually bitchier in real life than on the net, 'cause in real life you're forced to talk to people you don't like, while on the net you can just not talk to them and ignore their posts and stuff so they don't get in your way.

Oh yeah, and keep in mind that the people who made that thread are similar to a lot of peopler, and wouldn't act like that in person.

My two pence and I really like yer blog =)
x
- - STiCKs13
  - 23 Feb. 2008 @ 22:13:08
  Aww thanks.
  
  And yeah I get what you're saying, I think I'm funnier online too and funnier with certain people in real life...wish I was like that all the time!
  
  Damn internet making it all confoosing!
  
  x
  - Reply to comment
  - Permalink
- Lia (Visitor)
- 23 Feb. 2008 @ 23:02:38
I've lurked a bit on the Horum to catch up on the latest news and I can honestly say that I've never found you annoying. To a person not involved, they come across way worse than you have. I'm sick of people starting fights on the internet, it's pointless and it's obvious they wouldn't have the balls in real life. Also, I love yer blog, well done!
- - STiCKs13
  - 23 Feb. 2008 @ 23:17:38
  Thanks love.
  
  I'm just paranoid now of what I say. =/
  - Reply to comment
  - Permalink
- Betina (Visitor)
- http://www.myspace.com/manipunk
- 24 Feb. 2008 @ 22:29:02
A hate thread! Have people got no life or what?
(Sorry, I just find people who make hate threads and groups pretty pathetic...)

I stumbled over your blog sometime last year while searching for Noel Fielding-stuff, and I like to read it because it's about things I like (Mighty Boosh, Russell Brand, The Horrors...) and because you've got an interesting style of writing (can I say that, or have I just made a danish-english sentence??)

I think I'm generally a lot more sarcastic and open online, but it also depends on who I'm with.
With my friends I can be really weird but I get easily intimidated and then I shut up like an oyster
I don't think I got a particular "me". Sometimes I'm sweet and sometimes I'm just a bitch...
- - STiCKs13
  - 25 Feb. 2008 @ 01:44:36
  Yes you can say that, and thank you!
  
  And yeah I can be sarcy a hell of a lot online, but in real life I'm not really...
  
  Personalities are complex and I think over-analysis can be troublesome, I had an identity crisis for a bit back then. =/
  - Reply to comment
  - Permalink
- Robin (Visitor)
- 25 Feb. 2008 @ 05:34:18
I've not been on the Horum, but I've seen some of your posts at the Boosh forum, and I don't think you come off nasty or bitchy. Maybe sometimes a bit sarcastic, but in a humorous way, and I like that kind of humor.

I think we all present ourselves differently in different situations. I'd never go to my dad's and act like I would if I were out with my friends clubbing, for instance. What matters is at the end of the day are you happy with the person you are and how you treat others. You've always been nice to me, and I think you're a good person in general. I don't know you in real life (whatever that is these days) but I think how you are shows in your writing in your blog.

Maybe the people who did the whole hate thread thing are just jealous because you are quite intelligent and it shows. Or maybe they're just jealous because you've met so many people (I am jealous of you for that, lol ). Either way, I wouldn't put too much stock in what they say about you, hon, because anyone who has to knock another person down to make themselves look good isn't worth the time or worry!
- - STiCKs13
  - 25 Feb. 2008 @ 05:36:18
  Thanks Robin. ^_^
  
  *muchos kissage* xxxxxxxxx
  - Reply to comment
  - Permalink
- deathbed (Visitor)
- http://myspace.com/let_me_heal_these_wounds
- 28 Feb. 2008 @ 20:25:16
hey sticks i just saw this and was like WTF

i dont really know you personally and i think thats V harsh and not true as what ive seen of you (via comments, messages) around the online world you sound like a very nice person.

ignore them!!

and i always thought the horum was a nice place.. maybe not

xxxxx
- - STiCKs13
  - 29 Feb. 2008 @ 14:11:55
  Thank you, you're a diamond.
  
  x
  - Reply to comment
  - Permalink