Lexi is determined to prove he isn't like Noel Fielding

[These are the two main characters from my upcoming story I plan on publishing. The original was a fanfic story based on Julian Barratt and Noel Fielding, and I'm worried people will keep seeing these new characters as the old ones...so I did this for fun, it's all improvised.]

“Hey, I’m Lexi. Most of you might be imagining me as this spin-off Noel Fielding character but back up a minute, it isn’t like that, I’m nothing like the guy! You’ll find out a lot about me from reading the book but seeing as you can’t do that yet, you’ll just have to believe me, can you do that? I know what you’re thinking: you’re not gonna believe someone you don’t even know, right? And fair play, I get where you’re coming from but if you ever compare me to Noel Fielding again, I will seriously kick some ass. I bet he can’t kick ass…I could kick his ass!”

“Hey, Julian here. Like Lexi said earlier, there’s been a bit of a mix-up and people might be seeing us as people that we actually aren’t. The original story kind of messed that up for us and I hate that that happened but it can’t be helped. I assure you though, I’m also nothing like Julian Barratt, I swear! Look, I have blonde hair and wear different clothes than he does…and I’m not as, like…weird. Okay, not weird, but I certainly don’t call underwear ‘underpants’…that’s a bit of a dad word, isn’t it?”

“I’m serious, I honestly will punch anyone that continues to compare me to him, Julian!”

“I know, I know.”

"Well…no, I don’t think you do. I honestly will get angry.” 

" I don’t doubt you!”

“It’s frustrating, you know? I’m trying to be my own person and it’s like I have to try harder for people to stop seeing me as Noel f***ing Fielding.”

“Just be yourself, then, I am!”

“Yeah but I really don’t want to be like him.”

“What’s so bad about him??”

“He cried a lot and was a hardcore emo wuss.”

“Bit harsh…”

“Sorry, an emo wuss.”

“…”

“I’m not breaking it down to just ‘wuss’, he really was an emo wuss.”

“Can’t you just tell people you’re your own person not, threaten to kick Noel Fielding’s ass?”

“He makes me angry, Julian…angry like the wolf.”

“That’s ‘hungry like the wolf’.”

“He does not make me hungry…sweets do, though. Can we--”

“We are not going to the sweet shop again, stop!!”

Also, the story is going to be called 'The Other Side of the Fence', not 'Romeo + Julian'. I'm 34 pages in now. :)